Thursday, January 05, 2012

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find Out What It Means to Me: Or what it doesn't mean, in this case, which is nieces and nephews calling aunts and uncles Aunt and Uncle. This has been a Thing with my kids and extended family members, and yeah, I've had the talks about calling people what they want to be called, and showing respect to elders, and yada yada yada. I get that it's important to many folks, my kids' aunts and uncle in particular, and that even kids with special needs should be taught to honor social conventions. But I've been a Whatever Works, Change the Environment, Pick Your Battles mom for so long that it's hard for me to care about honorifics when other more important things are being done right. So, for example, when my kids are behaving well in a big gathering, and eating what they're served, and saying thank you for presents, and showing an interest in conversing with older relatives, I really hate to hear them constantly being corrected for leaving the Aunt or Uncle off a name. Maybe parenting kids with special needs makes you value content over form that way. I'd point out that other young family members have all of the latter with none of the former, but I'll respect their parents' priorities if they'll respect mine.

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